Screamfest 2004
(For a little flashback, read Screamfest 2003.)

The eight legged creature
He came back for a visit
We killed him dead,
But it's not dead, is it?
This Christmas arachnid
Was sitting right there
On the floor by my bed,
For a holiday scare.
Even though we flushed him,
And he's no longer here
I fully expect to get a visit
From the Christmas spider again next year.

For the 3rd year in a row, the Christmas spider has made an entrance. Every time I get out the Christmas decorations each year, he makes his presence known at some point, and that happened tonight. This time he was in my room, by my bed. We trick to make the cat get him, but he wasn't all that interested, so then Michael picked him up with a paper towel and flushed him. Or so he THOUGHT he flushed him. I walked into the bathroom, and he was still floating in the toilet...apparently he didn't go down the first time. I don't know why we even bother, because he'll be back next year. :::SHIVERS::: Maybe he's just trying to be friendly (yeah right). In short, stay tuned 'til next year for Screamfest '05!

Here's an oxymoron: "Drink responsibly." Somebody tell me again how those two words can go in the same sentence??

So tomorrow's Thanksgiving! 2004 is zipping by so fast, I think I heard it whistling through the crack in the window a minute ago. Oh wait...that's the cold, November wind. Imagine that...it's actually cold in the South...in November! Maybe we'll get to catch a smidgen of the Macy's parade in the morning while getting ready to head over to my Mom's. She made me my favorite as usual...pumpkin pie. What would I ever do without my Mom's punkin pies? Or her baked beans? Sausage balls? Pistachio salad? Heaven help us all! And instead of a traditional turkey, we're having deer...yes, deer. My Dad is a big time hunter...he has a nice little collection of deer heads he just moved out of his office to the house (since he's retiring the end of the year). My Mom's really lovin' THAT....not!!! She HATES having the feeling that she's being watched constantly by a herd of bucks. So anyway, he uses a special marinade...strips of deer tenderloin soak in all these spices for several days...and then he cooks them on the grill. It is the most awesome thing you've ever had. We plan on starting our feast at Noon, and then we have to be at Michael's parents' house at 2 for yet another feast. There are going to be soooo many people over there though, I'm not sure if we'd even be missed if we aren't there, lol.

I've started getting out the Christmas decorations, and so far, everything looks awesome. The mantle's decorated with garland, lights, my porcelain snowman collection, big pretty burgundy bows, stockings are hung, my kitchen table is decorated, coffee table, computer desk, top of the piano, even the bathroom. Basically all of my decorations are set out. We have to go get a tree though, and I plan on setting up my Christmas village this year. Oh yeah, and then we still have to decorate the outside of the house. Although it may sound that I've decorated hardly nothing at all, I've set out a LOT of decorations. You have to remember, I have an entire closet devoted to Christmas stuff, plus several tubs of it stored in the attic. So much to do, so much to do, but starting Friday, I'll have plenty of time to get started.

I must give Jacob a bath now and then get in the tub myself! TTFN! Hope everyone has a wonderful, happy & safe Thanksgiving! Try not to eat too much!

If you're married, or want to get married sometime in the future, you must read this and give this some thought. I only wish I had been taught this sooner. Maybe I was told some time before I got married and was too giddy to listen.

Marriage is not...I repeat...IS NOT about your own happiness.

If you are united in marriage and your goal is to be the best spouse you can be to the other, then you are in it for the RIGHT reasons. Great for you and your spouse.

If you are united in marriage and your goal is to be showered with as much happiness as you can, then you are in it for the WRONG reasons.

I know it's so easy to do ANYTHING for selfish reasons, but the TRUTH is...and this is a major newsflash...there are going to be times when your spouse will NOT make you happy, so if you go into marriage expecting to be happy all the time, you are in for a rude awakening. Trust me...I receive "rude awakenings" all the time, lol. This is not to say my husband is a bad husband at all...he's not...he's a great husband and I don't believe there is a better mate out there for me. BUT he is human and humans make mistakes...imagine that! And I am 100% positive that I do not always make him happy. Happiness..well..it HAPPENS, but it's not always there. Joy is..well...all the time. Even when times are rough you are still filled with joy and peace and assurance.

There is something called a "Covenant Marriage".

(Yeah, we say the vows before the preacher at the alter, but it's so easy to just repeat the preacher and get lost in everything else that's going on. And if you are really young when you get married like we were, the only thing on our minds probably was what we were going to be doing after the reception. I was giddy, in love, had dreams and wishes and hopes and desires and expectations, and never knew marriage could be "hard". My parents, if they ever had an argument or money trouble or any kind of marriage troubles, I NEVER knew about it. They kept it behind closed doors, so I always assumed married life must be a fairy tale. Then I got married, and BOOM! But again, that is another story, too.)

So back to this "Covenant Marriage". It means you EACH put your own needs aside for the OTHER and take care of that person's physical, emotional, and spiritual needs. You nurture their emotions, not break them down in some selfish attempt to have your own personal needs met. And the other spouse does the same in return.

There have actually been Christian studies showing that married couples that participate in "Covenant Marriage" live longer, are healthier individuals, have better sex lives, etc., etc. I don't know about anyone else, but I definitely want all those things...but most of all, a better marriage, a more joyful marriage.

Christian marriages are intended to help each marriage partner to grow in the Lord together.

Now the PROBLEM is when only ONE spouse has committed to this type of marriage, and the other spouse does not. One spouse is giving, giving, giving and his/her life is merely wasted on a person that was in it just for themselves. Like, if the husband is supplying every need to his wife, she's having her every need met and will be happy for awhile, and the marriage will be okay for awhile, maybe even a few years or so. But if she's not supplying the husband's needs in turn, he's going to become emotionally drained, unfulfilled, depressed, and probably not a very good husband eventually, which is going to make the wife unhappy anyway.

Another scenario would be...let's say the wife has been busy in the house all day, taking care of kids, cleaning, doing all the laundry, and cooks a nice meal, is presentable and refreshed with her hair and makeup done, the home is warm and inviting, when the husband returns home that evening from work, she greets him at the door with a smile, a hug, a kiss, and a "How was your day?" and then the first thing he does is barely gives the wife a response and turns on the TV. He hurriedly eats his supper before returning to the TV, while she cleans the kitchen, and then might get to sit down for a short while, gets the kids ready for bed, and is so exhausted she plops down on the couch and soon falls asleep. She has committed her life to her husband and their children, has she not? So that right there will make a woman feel unappreciated, unloved, like everything she worked for that day was for nothing. He barely noticed, or if he did, he offered no compliments. He didn't ask her about her day. He didn't offer any affection. The thing I want to say to ALL husbands out there, or soon-to-be husbands out there, when you walk through the door in the evenings, sure, I know you're tired...wives/moms are tired too...but when you walk through the door each evening, that's not the time to spend hours in front of the TV. That's your time to be the best husband and daddy you can be, and to do everything in your power to let her know how much you really love her and the children. And I promise, if the husband is doing that, as the Bible commands ("Husbands, love your wives..."), then the wife will more willingly, more easily submit (following her command) to him and care for him and meet his needs.

It's all ever so present in the Bible, but unfortunately, too many spouses have the wrong idea of what this means. Yes, the wife is to "submit" unto her own husband, but that doesn't mean the husband can simply spout off orders and demands and force her to obey. It also doesn't mean the wife is going to be unhappy and lose her sense of self if she "submits" to her husband. She will not be unhappy as long as she has a truly loving husband that is committed to her every need 100%, and in return she will have more willingness to do the things she's supposed to do as his wife. Too many people these days talk about "equal partnership" in marriages. Here's more breaking news...in God's eyes, there's no such thing. God has given both the husband/father and wife/mother different roles in a family. Yes, married couples are to discuss together important decisions together, but when it comes down to it, the husband, UNDER GOD'S LEADERSHIP, has the final authority. I'm not old-fashioned, my friends...I'm just going by the Bible.

BOTTOM LINE, If the husband is not under God's leadership, does not go before God in prayer about major decisions, then it makes it VERY hard for a wife to want to trust and follow in her husband's footsteps. If the wife doesn't have that Godly leader in the home, if she's a Christian, she is going to have to carry the burden of being the spiritual leader in the home, and it's not how God intended things to be.

I'm not sitting here saying my marriage is or isn't any of these things I wrote about. I'm just trying to write down what I believe marriage should and shouldn't be. I'm not a marriage expert, that's for sure, and it takes lots of time to perfect marriage, and even then it's still never PERFECT, but it's important to learn and grow and as you go. And always...always put God first. That numero uno.

Dang, and I thought last weekend was busy......

Unfortunately, my "to-do" list is a mile long, so the rest of the week isn't looking any less busy.

Friday:
1. Cleaned house
2. Went shopping with my Mother-in-Law. Went to Kohl's, bought me a pretty, red Christmas top, a pair of brown suede Sketchers (boots), and found my Father-in-Law his Christmas present.
3. Went to Target to look animated light-up deer and snowmen, but thought we'd seen them elsewhere cheaper, so didn't buy any. My Mother-in-Law bought the kids their Christmas outfits.
4. Went next door to the new Chinese restaurant...it was excellent. She had no idea I like Chinese. I guess it's because we never get to go there when Michael's with us since he doesn't care for it too much.
5. Walked clear across the parking lot to Kroger to see how much their deer cost.
6. Walked back across the parking lot to Home Depot only to find they were closing, so we went home.

Saturday:
1. Was supposed to meet my friend Amanda and her mother-in-law at the Southaven Goodwill at 10:30 a.m. I looked around and found Travis a brand new-looking pair of black church shoes, a pair of dress pants, and me some shoes and a set of Christmas dishes. They never showed up 'til 11:15, and Amanda found me and said they were going to be next door at Big Lots since her mother-in-law didn't want to look around in the Goodwill, although she had told Amanda earlier that she had wanted to check it out. ::sigh:: So I paid for my stuff and we went over to Big Lots where I bought my Christmas bows and wrapping paper...stuff like that. Oh yeah, and one of those white spiral trees that light up...for the yard.

2. We broke for lunch and went to Wendy's across the street. Then we tried to hint to Amanda's mother-in-law that we wanted to go to K-mart WITHOUT HER. It was impossible to look at ANYTHING WE wanted to while she was around. Amanda just kind of said "If you're tired and want to go rest or whatever, we can take Zech (Amanda's little boy) to the house, and me and Candy and Destiney (her daughter...and I only had Jacob with me...Travis went with Michael to get a haircut) can go make a few stops that we want to make." Surprisingly enough, Amanda's mother-in-law offered to take Zech to the house, so we ended up not having to go there first. In K-mart, I bought some outdoor lights, 12 plastic candy canes that you stick in the ground, an inflatable outdoor Winnie the Pooh in a Santa Clause suit and he sits on a "Hunny" pot. We already have the white icicle lights to hang on the house, but we needed to get some other stuff to make it really fun for the kids. Once we ditched Amanda's mother-in-law, we had a blast, just walking around K-mart, looking at stuff. Now Michael says that I've had my "shopping fix" for the year.

3. Michael and I went out on a much-needed date. We dropped the kids off at his parents' house, ate at Steak N Shake, and then went to see a sneak preview of "Christmas With the Kranks". It's based off of John Grisham's book, "Skipping Christmas". The movie had Tim Allen, Jamie Lee Curtis and Dan Akroyd in it. It's hilarious. Go see it. Between that movie and buying Christmas decorations, I was ready to come home and decorate the house, lol.

Sunday:
1. Went to church, did the usual playing piano and organ in church.

2. Ate lunch at CiCi's. Best AND cheapest place to go on a Sunday afternoon. Makes everyone happy. Pizza, pasta, breadsticks, salads, desserts, for $3.99/person...can't beat that with a stick.

3. Went to Schnucks to buy stuff to make cookies for the Thanksgiving Meal at church tonight.

4. Came home, made cookies, and stuck holographic snow flake window clings in the kitchen windows...very pretty. And it's the only snow we'll probably ever get around here, lol.

5. Went back to church for our special Thanksgiving service. It was great. We ate a lot of food...there were 2 deepfried turkeys and one smoked turkey....yummm. We had songs (I had to play a little bity keyboard on a stand since we had it in the fellowship hall.) and the teenagers sang a song called "Thank You, Lord". Then we had a time of testimony where anyone who wanted to could tell what they are thankful for.

6. After church, we went to my sister-in-law's house to pick up the steam cleaner so I can clean my nasty crudded-over carpet.

Tomorrow:
1. Clean carpet.
2. Do the regular house cleaning
3. Laundry (if time permits)
4. Begin dragging out decorations for inside, minus the tree. That takes "man strength", or so I'm told.

I want to start working on the OUTSIDE, but Michael needs to trim the yard ONE MORE TIME so that it'll look good when I get the lights outside on the house. And that can't be done 'til SATURDAY because by the time he gets home from work during the week, it's dark. I threatened to get out the lawn mower and do it myself. I'm the type person that I want stuff done NOW and I don't want to have to wait for other people to help me, so I take it upon myself to do it.

My feet are so tired and sore. I can barely hold my eyes open. I'm going to bed! Hope this update will hold everyone over for awhile....goodness knows when I'll be able to update again! TTFN!